Have you ever woken up and stubbed your toe?… looked out the window and seen a grey miserable sky?… a pounding headache?… horrendous traffic on the way to work?… and you say to yourself, “It’s going to be one of those days!”?
Well we all have these moments from time to time… so let me share with you 5 top tips for changing your state immediately.
1) Make a conscious decision to change your state.
Whilst this sounds obvious, many of us get so caught up in a spiral of negativity that it becomes hard to make the time to create change. Or, sometimes we simply accept that we have to spend the rest of the day feeling this bad… when this is not true!
Think about it… if you suddenly found out you’d won the lottery… you wouldn’t wait till tomorrow to get excited about it!
So actively decide to turn your day around and then find a quiet place where you won’t be disturbed for 5 minutes. (If you are at work, even an empty toilet cubicle will do!)
2) Think about your physiology.
When people are upset, miserable and distressed it affects everything about their body. The way they stand, the rate and depth of breathing, the muscles/tone in their face, their posture…. the list goes on!
However, what people don’t always realise is that this is also works the other way round.
Your physiology also affects how you feel. For example, the act of making yourself smile consciously, whilst it may feel false, will actively release serotonin (happy chemicals) into your body.
So become aware of your posture right now… if your head his down and slumped, if your face is creased with frown lines, if your arms are crossed and folded… make a change!
Stand up straight, head back, deep breaths, arms relaxed and hanging loosely by your side… and smile.Your feelings will change too!
3) Remember, you get what you focus on.
If you ever go and do an advanced driving course they will often take you to a skid pan. This is a great experience and you get to learn how to control your car during a skid. One thing they always teach you though is to focus on where you want to go. So, if whilst your skidding you start saying to yourself, “don’t hit the wall… don’t hit the wall!” chances are that’s what you hit! Instead you should be focusing on the wide open space you want to move towards.
If you are having a bad day, you are now likely to be filtering for, and spotting, all the things that could go wrong. This strategy will simply start inviting more of these frustrating and difficult events into your day.
So instead, quickly imagine your day going differently. Visualise things going well for the rest of the day… clear roads on your drive home… meetings going well… productivity galore… etc
Please note: if, whilst you are picturing this desired day, a little internal dialogue pops and says things like, “I bet it won’t really happen like this”… just push the voice further and further away until it’s out of earshot!
4) Use hindsight ahead of time.
Close your eyes and imagine yourself in one years time… and now, step into this future image of yourself. From this point, look back at the events of that day (those events that set you off on the wrong path). Now, laugh about them and realise that in the grand scheme of what’s really important and really affects your future these things barely even register.
You see many people say things like, “I bet in a years time we’ll laugh about all of this… the truth is… why wait?”
5) Stop… Re-connect… Move forwards.
Now you have stopped, broken the cycle and taken yourself off to a quiet place… it’s time to use one final quick method.
Think back to a time when you felt really good. If it helps to do so, close your eyes and see what you were seeing at the time, really make these vivid mental images and start noticing the details. What shapes and colours were you seeing at the time? What were your surroundings? etc. Now, focus on what sounds could you hear? Were people saying things to you? What were you saying to yourself? What were the sounds in the background?
At the point that you begin to relive this experience allow the positive feelings to flood back in and keeping this good feeling inside… once again imagine the rest of the day going well.
Now open your eyes but keep that positive feeling inside.
These tips are quick and easy methods for changing your state. Work through them as and when you need but don’t worry… if these tips don’t work for you and you find yourself stuck in a spiral of stress, anxiety or negativity, then get in touch, we can help!